1/21/20
Amelia & Marie woke up with me this morning. It was the earliest I’ve gotten up in weeks. I was late to work again but that’s because I dropped Amelia off at school. She is older so she got to go to a new class. Marie’s face/tooth did not hurt as much today. That makes me glad. Only, I was being frisky with Marie, but I smocked the side of her face that was in a lot of pain and instantly killed the mood.
I didn’t buy a web host yet. I spent a lot of time at work watching car crash compilations. There is an off—(fuck I can’t write tonight)—pleasure I get from watching them. I am watching them on YouTube so obviously they’re not snuff videos.
Marie is singing softly from the bathroom & I love her dearly. I want to give her a blowjob. If I don’t fall asleep while putting Amelia to bed then I will. When I ear Marie out sometimes I don’t even think. I just like to make her feel good.
I tried to sketch my face as I looked in the mirror. ^It’s not bad not great. This is why I write. I like the eyes & do have bags. Life is tiring but worth it. Even if I am mad sometimes I’m grateful for the simple fact of being.
I love my daughter, wife, sister, mom, & dad so fucking much, no joke.
E.B.
Ed Boy 