The play I wrote finally premiered. Marie’s parents came and picked Amelia up for a few days so Marie and I got to watch it together, alone. It was nice. We went on a small jog together after work then got pizza and enjoyed some theatre. It was great seeing my piece alive and my friend acting in it. The direction was interesting, and a unique way to perform theatre in a digital-only space. Some things worked and some things didn’t but, in the end, I think the people who watched it were pleasantly surprised.
It’s funny: I sent out an email to some coworkers about it and some said they’d try to see it. In the end I shouldn’t care, but part of me doesn’t want them to. Not because I’m ashamed. But because, inextricably, people will change their opinions on you once they see art you’ve made. Somewhere along the lines of working with someone you’ll describe their character based around their habits. Only when you introduce art or expression into that relationship they see you in a different light. Those habits have a different context, then.
Altogether I think I just want to be seen for me, and this play expresses a lot of who I am, so I could just be afraid of exposing myself. Nothing bad will come of it other than the vulnerability of being known, but even then I don’t necessarily need my coworkers seeing into my personal brain. No going back now, though.