Eat my Words

8-24-21

Let it be known that I love to eat. Let it also be known I will eat my own words. I was wrong: Amelia does have a lot of cavities and does need a crown and does need oral surgery. Much as I did not want that to be true I will admit when I was wrong. It’s been a stressful few weeks and I didn’t want to believe everything that was going on because denying can sometimes be easier than acceptance.

Marie took Amelia to her dentist down by her parent’s for a second opinion and they confirmed the issues. In the end they gave more context to the situation and let us know that there is a good possibility it’s genetic. My mom has enamel issues, Marie’s mom and grandma have enamel issues, and both Marie and her sister suffer from it as well.

There is a fear when it comes to parenting. For me that is a fear of failure. Not necessarily failing a task, but failing my child; not responding correctly to a set of circumstances that then indirectly affect my daughter more than me. We are trying not to worry. But the reality is that she will likely not have anything done for 1-2 months simply due to the overwhelming backlog that all local medical facilities are currently facing.

American healthcare is a joke. And due to an accident our child has to suffer for months. I am not surprised, and my feelings have not changed simply because I am now affected. I have felt this way for years and am trying to take my dose of systemic failure on the chin.

-E.B.

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